Psychological insights on relationships: rejections, breakups, making relationships happy, unhealthy dynamics, and general psychology.

How To Make a Long Distance Relationship Work

In this post, I will provide you with practical tips for how to make long distance relationships work.

As you’ll see—this will be an optimistic post.

Man and woman are sitting

Long distance relationships improve communication.

In such relationships, people are forced to communicate since they don’t have opportunities for other things (shared experiences or physical contact). For these reasons, people in long-distance relationships reveal more about themselves to each other and develop an intense closeness.

Because sooner or later, when shallow conversations are exhausted, deeper discussions on important topics arise. Of course, if you know how to communicate to develop closeness, I will tell you how to achieve that in this text.

With this increased communication, we also have fewer harmful communications because:

  • A partner can always end a phone or video call.
  • The physical distance increases the uncertainty of staying together, prompting people to be more careful not to hurt their partner.
  • Only when you contact your partner do you have time to calm down, collect your thoughts, and express less dissatisfaction, anger, etc.

Another advantage of long-distance relationships is the idealization of the partner

Long distance relationship

Which occurs simply because they are far from you.

Not having a close insight into your partner’s daily life and flaws leaves ample room for idealization. Therefore, people in long-distance relationships often idealize their partners extensively. It’s also a common syndrome that people want what they don’t have. Long distance relationships can be a significant source of longing and absence.

Women are more likely to accept long distance relationships. Mainly because they often have more significant social circles and a lower sexual libido than men.

Additionally, men find separations more challenging due to competition, as there is a higher likelihood that other men will court a woman than vice versa. When guys are aware of this, it troubles them a lot. So, apart from the separation, shock, and yearning that both girls and guys endure, guys also struggle with these issues.

However, beyond statistics, I would say that anyone with less trust in their partner may struggle with that.

Long distance relationship

Long distance relationships involve a lot of hope and optimism.

Therefore, people in them are inherently more optimistic and believe more in a positive outcome and the survival of such relationships. I mean, if you’re a pessimistic person, a long-distance relationship probably isn’t for you, but if you’re optimistic, why not?

Long distance relationships provide more freedom.

Making them attractive to people who value such things (freedom). In long-distance relationships, people can get the best of both worlds: space and a relationship simultaneously.

And finally, crucial to long distance relationships is that the couple believes they will eventually be physically together. If either person in the couple doesn’t believe this, the relationship can quickly turn into shared agony.

How to make long distance relationships work and how to improve them:

Long distance relationship

The extent to which we want it to succeed, or whether we are indifferent, will also determine how much effort we put into the relationship.

The fundamental prerequisite for a good long distance relationship

1. Both partners genuinely want to maintain that relationship.

Since many of you are in different cities and new people will enter your lives, it’s certain that you’ll be tempted to try something new and different with someone who isn’t your partner. However, suppose both of you have truly decided on your relationship and are very stubborn about it; then you have a great chance of making it work because it has that basic ingredient: determination.

That falls into the category of mandatory things.

2. The second must-have is that you must be secure in your partner because otherwise, you’ll torment both yourself and them.

Couple in long distance relationship

The partner’s role is to instill confidence in you, and yours is not to play with excessive jealousy and tendencies toward suspicion. You might need to have repeated conversations on this topic until both of you calm down and reassure each other that you’re safe, so be prepared for them. But if you love each other and want each other, it’s worth having such conversations.

3. The third mandatory thing is to set:

  • A date for the ultimate reunion, whether in a year, two, or five.
  • Dates when you’ll meet (vacations, holidays, weekends). And if you’re already setting reunion dates, it would be great to determine what you’ll do then. Because if you come up with something exciting and interesting—something you both look forward to—you’ll have an even greater desire to see your partner. We’re ultimately somewhat selfish beings and like to get the most out of our entertainment. (In the sense that if I’m coming, let it be exciting.).

Desirable things in long distance relationships:

Choose frequent (not burdensome) and quality communication.

A beautiful woman sitting and thinking how to make a man fall in love with her

Speak with emotion. In that way, you will become an interesting interlocutor.

If you’re in a long distance relationship, you can thank the internet and technology daily for providing various means of communication. And if these means are combined with the freedom I mentioned, which is part of this entire project, it could turn you into an ideal conversationalist. Precisely because you don’t spend so much time together, you have a lot of time for your friends and events. Which can be a good topic to share with your partner.

My recommendation is to be detailed about what happened to you and to recount it with emotion, whether it’s: I had a great time; John, Emma, and Will were there, or I felt down; neither John, Emma, nor Will were there.

Use Technology.

Long distance relationship

It can also help you share current details, small videos, and photos and be in touch the moment something happens, which you might not practice if you knew you would meet in the evening.

Another related thing is doing things together while on a video or phone call. For example, watching a movie together, cooking, walking the dog together, having phone sex, playing quizzes, online games, or whatever you enjoy.

It is desirable that you only miss the communication schedule if you absolutely have to. That provides security and instills reliability.

Speaking of security and reliability, I also suggest not unsettling your partner with news in a way like, “Hey, today I’m going night swimming with three completely new friends!” If possible, first assure your partner that everything is under control before you go and have fun. It would relax them quite a bit.

Breaking up a long distance relationship.

Long distance relationship

People who experience this tend to blame the distance for the breakup. But on the other hand, we know that physically very close relationships also break up, so the distance might not have had anything to do with it. Relationships have their flows, better and worse periods, and ups and downs.

So the distance should not be considered the absolute reason for a breakup but rather be objective. Maybe the partner fell out of love or changed their life path? The relationship may have become monotonous?

It may have nothing to do with the distance. But if you stick to that as the sole reason, it can lead you to desperately try to get closer to your partner. Also to save the situation and destroy everything you’ve built so far: your jobs, the countries where you’re waiting for papers, and your studies. Trust me, I’ve talked to my clients about this many times.

Long distance relationship

As I said, remember to live a beautiful and prosperous life while anticipating your partner’s call. And don’t let all your focus be on when you’ll hear from each other. This way, you’ll become a better conversationalist, a happier individual, more enjoyable, and more fulfilled and cheerful. And your partner, who talks to you, will receive nicer emotions from you.

And we know that people always lean towards pleasant emotions and shy away from unpleasant ones. We know that this increases the chance of maintaining your long-distance relationship.

So, that’s about it. As you can see, your long distance relationship is not necessarily doomed to failure. As they say, there are many ways to improve it further.

But what’s important is to remember to turn it into a close-proximity relationship eventually.

default user=s40 pReplyForward

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

error: Content is protected !!