In this blog-post, we talk about the circumstances that cause people who rejected you to change their minds and answer the following questions: Can a person fall in love with you after they reject you and How to keep that person when they finally come back.
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Yes, they can. And in fact, they often change it.
In this article, we talk about the circumstances under which this happens. If you want to read more about the reasons why someone rejects you and changes their mind, you have this text: 7 reasons why people who rejected you come back.
They are equally important and can be decisive for someone rejecting you and changing their mind.
So, Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind Depending On:
Changes In Their Life
If you were rejected for the first time because something was going on in that person’s life, it is possible that you may become an option for another attempt when that clears up.
We often think people reject us because something is wrong with us, but more often people leave because they have other things going on in their lives. They may still be in love with their ex-partners who suddenly re-enter their lives, or they may be preoccupied with something significant happening in their life (financial problems, someone falling ill, issues with their ex-partner, etc.).
Person may be completely exhausted and lack the energy necessary for a relationship.
Really a lot depends on what is happening in someone’s life and these things can be hidden. But people don’t think about it because they are too focused on their pain and on analyzing themselves, their mistakes, more obvious things that happen to a person etc.
When certain things are resolved, space can be freed up for you.
And, I’m so sorry more people don’t count on this. The reason for this is that people experience an ego injury when they are rejected and then they just deal with it (how to heal the wounds, to explain the reasons to themselves, etc.)
However, circumstances in someone’s life are a common reason why someone rejects you. And if you take that into account and wait for the circumstances to resolve, you might get a new chance with your crush.
đź“ŤCheck this by remembering what the person talked about when you were seeing each other.
But I say, maybe what is bothering the person was not for the public, so it remained hidden. In that case, try to be patient and not to torture yourself in the meantime.
In any case, this would be the first thing I would consider when someone rejects me. I would never dwell on my flaws, but think about what happens to a person in life.
đź“Ś Note: But, I would never waste time wondering if things in their lives would be resolved. Some things can last for tens of years (falling in love with a more important person, for example). Don’t waste your time.
The Best Way To Make Someone Regret Leaving You
Their Character
Again, people often think they are rejected solely because of themselves, but that may not be true.
![Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind? 2 Black couple , woman asks herself can a guy change his mind after rejecting you](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/black-couple-1-1024x319.jpg)
Sometimes, people reject us because of their specific characteristics.
For example, they might be fearful or adventurous, workaholics, irresponsible, jealous, etc. Any character trait can be a good reason why someone rejects you. It literally depends on how they deal with that trait and how you fit into it.
- I remember a case of a young man who was very jealous of his girlfriend’s higher education. They failed to sustain the relationship because he felt inferior to her and rejected her to avoid feeling that way around her anymore, plus an unconscious need to lower her to a lower level.
But this isn’t something people brag about. No one will say, “You know, I’m too fearful, disorganized, or have difficulty attaching, and that’s why it’s hard for me to be in a relationship.”
However, even without it being verbalized, the character can be a reason why you were rejected at one point, and a change, or at least an attempt to change in character, is why they tried again with you.
For example, someone may decide to try to have a good relationship after therapy or because they realize that they lost a good person because of behavior.
And believe me, I’ve had many clients in my career who regretted losing someone and would give anything in the world to get a second chance.
đź“Ť Check this by analyzing the person’s past. Try to collect information about previous relationships, character traits and the person that people emphasize. You can get this information through social networks, friends and former partners.
If a person tries to “defeat themself”, it is very possible that they will also try to bring you back into their life. It is also possible that they judge you to be valuable enough to try to overcome their life-controlling characteristics. And I have seen this few times in my career.
Because They Forgot Who You Are
![Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind? 3 Couple; Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/fight-2-1024x319.jpg)
Can be a reason why someone who rejected you change their mind. If they didn’t like some of your features.
And for that it is necessary to create a distance between you.
Distance, in this case, is a positive thing, and if someone rejects you, it’s necessary to create it. It helps the person forget things they didn’t like about you and leave space for the reasons above (to change circumstances and character, perhaps). And don’t worry, the person will forget the past events between you because that’s how the brain works – it suppresses irrelevant and unpleasant information. It’s its way of maintaining optimism and not burdening itself with difficult things.
Now look at these poor circumstances, where bad previous attempts actually work in your favor:
- Usually, if you weren’t important to someone, because of the distance, they would forget the attempt between you.
- If they didn’t like you, in that time they’d suppress unpleasant experiences.
- If you had bad first attempts, they’d turn them into something acceptable.
đź“Ś Of course, this doesn’t apply if you’ve threatened that person in any way; then their defense mechanism is to remember who you are so as not to get into an unpleasant situation again.
However, everything that isn’t drastic, like endangering someone, is usually suppressed, memories turn into something more acceptable, maturity brings new insights and assessments of the situation, and space opens up for new attempts.
That’s why it’s good to create distance for a few months so the person can forget why they didn’t choose you.
The greater the distance, the better the circumstances are for you. Don’t be afraid of the distance. It is important and useful.
Why We Are In Love With Someone – Psychological Explanation
What Kind of Offer You Are to Them
![Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind? 4 Couple in love](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/relationship-18-1024x319.jpg)
If something in their life has changed, great. If they have changed – great. But let’s talk a little more about your influence on the whole relationship and what you could do.
The hypothesis is that you were rejected because you weren’t something a person prefers: not being enough into sports, not being confident enough, not being charismatic, etc.
If the person realizes that you’ve become a better offer for them, you may get another chance. As I mentioned in this post, people choose us based on their preferences. As you can see, this is about your changes.
Of course, there’s also the possibility that a person’s preferences change. They may value something, and in the next moment they want something else that you fit into. Like material things at one moment and spiritual things in the next one, or vice versa. This is possible and certainly you know such people.
But, people change preferences rarely and very slowly, so I wouldn’t count on it.
đź“ŤOf course, here is my recommendation: be very clear and obvious about what the other person wants. Whatever they want, they have likely mentioned it.
Additionally, insights into their previous relationships can give you the answers you’re looking for. Whatever stands out—whether good or bad—about their previous partners is likely what they value.
Don’t be too surprised by what you find, but if you truly want to be with that person, consider embodying those qualities.
Personally, I wouldn’t change for someone in ways that feel unnatural to me (unless it’s a positive change, of course). However, people are often willing to go to great lengths to win over someone they care about.
And when you understand what that person wants in his life, if you want that person become what they want.
- I remember a case of a girl who became a big fan of open relationships because her crush wanted it. They are still together today.
However, even if they change their mind and come back, we have another challenge:
How To Keep That Person?
![Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind? 5 Couple in love;](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/n3-1024x574.jpg)
So the person came back to try again with you. It’s important that we talk about this because it’s actually a common thing, for people to reject you and then change their minds.
People often come back to see what’s going on with you.
If you’re the same as you were before, the person will do the same thing as before: leave.
That’s why it’s necessary to carefully consider and understand why you were rejected and to become or do the opposite.
For example, if you were rejected because you didn’t exude self-esteem, you obviously need to become stronger. If you were rejected because you were too extroverted, you must become the opposite.
The same goes for physical fitness and financial situation, your hobbies, passions, attitudes, the way you live life, etc. But unfortunately, it also applies to the inner needs of the other person that you may not see and recognize.
It’s important to remember that it’s not enough for circumstances or you to change only briefly to win that person. Fake it till you make it won’t work. If that’s your plan, the person will think you’ve deceived them, and the second breakup is usually final.
To become attractive to that person, it’s necessary to fully adapt to new actions, values, changes, etc.
Why Don’t You Give Your Partner What They Want?
![Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind? 6 Man and woman ask: How To Get Your Ex Back After Hurting Them](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/26032024_3-1024x319.jpg)
But here, I want to write one note:
I’m generally not a big fan of returning to people who have rejected us. From everything you’ve read so far, you can see that whether you’ll be with someone who has come back depends a lot on what that person wants, feels, and thinks, which is very difficult to understand if they haven’t been explicit.
- If a person doesn’t show basic, fundamental interest in you (if who you are isn’t enough for them), you’re essentially starting from a deep deficit just to reach a basic level of interest (zero), let alone building something more. My warmest, most sincere advice is not to bother with people who aren’t even interested in you. Choose people with whom you have a solid starting point.
- Another thing. Whatever the person wants, you may be able to become that person and practice that new role… but what if your sympathy wants the finished product? Someone who is already what they want. Or what if they change their mind in the meantime?
Understand that specific things and features that people want usually come bundled with other features. And then they make the finished product.
This would obviously mean that you need to change your entire personality because of another person. And I’m not sure that anyone is worth it. Especially since those changes that are expected of you can be drastic, outside of your moral values, very strange, etc.
In my career, I have had several cases where people have succeeded in that. That they went completely against themselves to become something their partner wants. However, it is a painful process, and almost none of them were convinced that they were doing the right thing.
Can Someone Fall In Love With You After They Reject You?
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Can a person who rejected you change their mind?](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/28022024_3.jpg)
A person can fall in love with someone they previously rejected, but only:
- Under completely changed circumstances in their life, thus causing a change in them
- If you are completely changed,
1. Completely Changed Circumstances
mean they have experienced their old lifestyle as bad and accepted new values.
This implies that a person has experienced some major disappointment or injury, and as a result, the values ​​from their previous life are unacceptable, and everything opposite of that is desirable.
However, this is a small chance because it implies a complete character change.
For example, if you were rejected because you were not wealthy enough, and the person wants a good lifestyle, of course, there is a possibility of disappointment in high society, spending money on material things, or going bankrupt and having to lower their standards, like Nicole Kidman in the old movie Far and Away.
This is just an example. A person can be disappointed in players, in unpredictable people, business people, etc. and want something completely different.
đź“Ś Circumstances do change character, of course, but usually only when a person “hits rock bottom” and is forced to change because their character leads them into problems and dangers.
And in that case: is this the person you still want?
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2 Psychological Reasons Behind Obsession After Rejection
2. They Can Fall In Love With You If You Are Completely Changed.
You may become brave by being fearful, for example. Or from someone with little self-confidence to someone with a lot of self-confidence. And why not? There is a chance that the person will fall in love with you (obviously, changes must be either for the better or in line with what the person wants). These things happen.
However, do not forget that if you change, there is a huge chance that the person will no longer be interesting to you.
Remember, you liked them when you were a different version of yourself. Then, in your mind you were complementary. When you become a new version of yourself, your tastes in people will also change.
- I remember a case of a guy who had been in love with the same girl since elementary school. She wasn’t interested in him because he was a simple boy, but when he proved to be very successful and resourceful in business, she fell in love with him. However, by then, he already had a wide choice of other women, and although he tried with his high school love because of his infatuation, but fantasy quickly fell apart.
![Can a Person Who Rejected You Change Their Mind? 9 Man and woman, can a guy come back after rejecting you](https://relationships.blog/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/20012024_12.jpg)
The essence is that you will definitely become more attractive to that person if you change.
But, we have another interesting circumstance here. People do not like to change their dynamics and relationships. So if you become different, it is possible that the person will like you very much, but! that they will try to bring you back to the old dynamic… because now they are afraid that they are not good enough for you.
Descriptive: you become more attractive, but the person still treats you as not attractive enough. Complicated, but you understand.
However, I do not recommend this dynamic at all, and if you recognize it – stay away from there.
The Chinese say: never criticize a man who is moving forward, no matter how slowly he goes.
I say: Beware of this. This is a common thing. You don’t need that.
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Don’t forget:
- people, unfortunately, change their opinions about other people very slowly
- they try to maintain their old opinion with evidence
- they will convince themselves that the person in front of them is faking changes,
- people don’t like changes in relationship dynamics.
In cases where someone rejected you in the past (the old version of yourself), it’s likely because you were perceived as a lesser version of yourself, they felt superior, or they simply had no interest.
However, there’s another reason why someone might not accept your positive change: they could be fearful of facing consequences for their past actions towards you.
I hope this helped you. Dee